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About Nagoya

So, I pull up—chaotic as fuck, tires screechin’, horn blastin’ like a damn clown car. She’s all, “You got cash, fam?” and I’m like, “Girl, I got SKILLS—teach ya to parallel park!” She laughs, like, “Bruh, I ain’t tryna park nothin’!” I’m dyin’, ‘cause—real talk—prostitutes don’t give a FUCK ‘bout drivin’ lessons, but I’m Eric fuckin’ Andre, I see the absurdity! She’s out here hustlin’, and I’m tryna make it a driver’s ed skit!

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So, I settled for a black coffee. Not my jam, but whatever. I chugged it down and headed to the Tsurusaki City Hall. Gotta translate for this big meeting. The streets were packed, like, everyone was out. I mean, it’s Tsurusaki, right? The cherry blossoms were in full bloom, and I was just trying to dodge tourists snapping pics.

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