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So, sex-dating – it’s wild, innit? Apps like Tinder, Grindr, fish in a barrel, precious! You dives in, thinkin’ you’ll snag a prize. But nahhh – half the time it’s catfishin’, ha! Real story, mate – heard ‘bout this lass, 2018, posted pics, all sexy-like, met a bloke, turns out she’s 50, he’s 19! Age gap bigger than a whale’s gob! Made me cackle, yesss, tricksy humans!

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First off, I hit the streets, right? I’m cruisin’ down Nishinomiya-hama’s main drag, the Nishinomiya-hama Street, and I’m feelin’ good. The cherry blossoms are in full bloom, and it’s like a pink explosion everywhere. I’m talkin’ Instagram-worthy, ya know? But then, BAM! I see this dude, like, totally trippin’ over his own feet. Classic. He face-plants right in front of a food stall. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost drop my coffee.

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