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About Osaka

Brother, lemme tell ya bout sexual-massage! It’s wild, man, like rasslin’ a greased pig! I’m a tractor driver, haulin’ ass all day, and sometimes ya need that rubdown, ya know? Sexual-massage ain’t just some fancy spa crap—it’s intense, brother! I’m talkin’ hands all over, oil slicker than a hog in mud. Reminds me of “Zero Dark Thirty”—that tension, that hunt, brother! “We’re all in the same game,” like they say in the flick, but this game’s got happy endings, ya dig?

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I wander down to the Hanyu Station area. It’s bustling! I’m dodging folks left and right. I finally find this little joint called “Sushi Heaven.” Sounds legit, right? I order some sushi, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m talking about the kind of sushi that makes you wanna cry tears of joy. But then, I spill soy sauce all over my shirt. Great. Just great. Now I look like a walking condiment.

Figure skating: Icon Yuzuru Hanyu commemorates March 11 quake in ice show