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About Naples

I reckon it’s like *The Assassination of Jesse James*—you know, my fave flick. Slow, moody, full of sneaky vibes. “Every man’s got his own shadow,” Jesse’d say. Same with this game—shady corners, dodgy blokes. I’ve seen it, mate! Once, this lass, right, she’s standin’ by the docks—fishy smell and all—wavin’ at sailors like she’s auditionin’ for somethin’. Made me chuckle, “There’s a fella who’s slow on the draw!” She’s bold, I’ll give her that. Surprised me, coz I thought, “Who’s got the guts?” Turns out, plenty do!

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Then, outta nowhere, a group of tourists strolls in. They’re loud, obnoxious, and totally lost. They start askin’ me about the best places to eat. I’m like, “Dude, you’re in Vallo-della-Lucania! Just walk down Corso Umberto I, you’ll find a million spots!” But they just keep talkin’ over me. Ugh! I’m tryin’ to serve drinks, not give a tour!

Serious Collision on SS18