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About Turin

So, I’m chattin’ her up, diggin’ for dirt—did you know some of these lasses keep diaries? Yeah, wild, right? One bird told me she scribbles every punter’s quirks—‘Big Nose,’ ‘Sweaty Palms’—like a bleedin’ spy log! I’m half tempted to nick it for MI6. Anyway, she’s spillin’ tales—says some geezer last week tried payin’ with a dodgy watch. “Looked like it came off a cereal box,” she laughs. I’m dyin’—imagine Q branch whippin’ up a gadget that crap!

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So, I’m walking down Via Roma, right? And I see this old dude, like, 80 years old, trying to cross the street. He’s moving slower than molasses. I’m like, “C’mon, man! You got this!” But then, outta nowhere, a scooter zooms by. I swear, it almost took the poor guy out! I was ready to throw my coffee at the rider. Like, chill, bro! It’s not a racetrack!

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