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Little known fact: back in the 80s, hookers used to signal with red hankies—sneaky, huh? Kinda like Royal hidin’ his scams! Anyway, I’m chattin’ her up, she’s spillin’ tea—says she once banged a guy who paid in rare coins. Coins! Who does that? Surprised me, honestly—thought that shit only happened in movies. I’m thinkin’, “This chick’s a legend, a real Chas Tenenbaum hustler!”

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Then, I bumped into my buddy Marco. He’s a fellow scientist but way more chill than me. He was like, “Dude, you look like you’ve seen a ghost.” I told him about my lab explosion. He just laughed and said, “At least you didn’t blow up the whole building!” Thanks, Marco. Real supportive.

New UNIFIL Deputy Force Commander assumes charge, 05 May 2010