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About Bari

Ain’t easy tho. These streets? Dirty, loud, chaotic as hell. Makes me mad, all this noise drownin out my thoughts. I’m tryna find her, right? Someone classy, maybe, like Zero’s lobby boy vibes. But nah, it’s all grit out here. Saw this one chick, heels clickin, skirt shorter than a Wes Anderson runnin time. I’m like, “Well, isn’t this a picturesque little mess?” Straight outta the movie, baby.

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Go through the many galleries to see classy ladies crapping their cute panties, go down and dirty and fuck hardcore while being covered in shit, or masturbate and ride dicks until they explode .

Then, I spot a group of tourists. They’re lost, looking at a map like it’s a puzzle. I can’t help it. I stroll over, “Hey, you guys need help?” They’re like, “We’re looking for the best gelato.” I’m like, “Dude, you’re in Soave! Just follow your nose!” They laugh, and I feel like a hero for a sec.

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