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Once saw this chick, all leather and attitude—Furiosa vibes, swear it! Thought, “Oh, shiny and chrome!” but she quoted me 5k rubles. Five bloody thousand! Got mad, like, “Witness me!” mad—could buy a tank of gas for that in Max’s world! Bargained her down to 2k, felt like a wasteland king. We swears! She smirked, said, “You’re weird, grandpa,”—cheeky lil shit, made me laugh. Happy as a pig in mud, tho.

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So, I’m tryin’ to shake off the pigeon drama, and I head to the ancient ruins. You know, the ones that make you feel like you’re in a time machine? The Temple of Venus is just chillin’ there, and I’m like, “Wow, this is epic.” But then, I trip over a rock. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out, lookin’ like a fool.

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