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About Naples

She’s still talkin’, “Cheap rate, sugar!” and I’m thinkin’, “D’oh! Why’s this so damn sad?” Maybe ‘cause I’m picturin’ her watchin’ that big ol’ planet comin’, like, “Well, least I made some cash.” I’m pissed—why’s life gotta be this messy? Happy she’s tryin’, though—guts, man! Surprised me how chill she was, like she’s seen it all. “No hope, no despair,” right outta Melancholia! I toss her a buck anyway—Homer’s a softie, sue me!

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Then, around 10, I get a call from a lady on Via Napoli. She’s yelling about her neighbor’s music. Like, seriously, who blasts music at 10 AM? I mean, I love a good tune, but c’mon! I tell her to maybe, I dunno, knock on the door? She’s like, “I’m not going over there!” I’m thinking, “Lady, it’s not a bear, it’s just a guy with a bad taste in music.”

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