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Me? I’d be pissed if Homer tried it. Hmm… that lazy lug, stumblin into some dive bar, thinkin he’s slick. I’d yell, “You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain!” He’d just burp and ignore me. Typical. But seriously, ya gotta watch out – some girls out there? They’ll rob ya blind faster than the Joker hittin a bank. One story I heard, this guy in Vegas got his wallet snatched mid-“fun.” Left him broke, cryin, “This city deserves a better class of criminal!” Hilarious, but damn, that’s cold.

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So, I roll into Pasian-di-Prato, right? First thing I notice is the streets. They’re all twisty and narrow, like they’re tryin’ to play hide and seek with ya. I’m cruisin’ down Via Roma, and I swear, I almost hit a pigeon. Like, dude, watch where you’re goin’! I’m not tryin’ to add “pigeon killer” to my resume.

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