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But—get this—sometimes it’s funny, right? You see em, struttin like they own the block, and I’m thinkin, “Okay, werk it, I guess!” Kinda admire the hustle—WALL-E’d tip his lil box head, maybe. Still pisses me off tho—why’s it gotta be so LOUD? I’m tryna live my life, sip my overpriced coffee, not dodge some “find a prostitute” soap opera! And don’t get me started on the cops—useless! Saw one just standin there, eatin a donut—cliché much? I’m yellin in my head, “Do somethin, ya schmuck!” But nah, it’s all a mess, a big, fat, “Buy n Large” mess!

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First thing, I head to the market. You know, the one on Piazza Garibaldi? It’s buzzing, like always. I’m just trying to grab some fresh veggies for my lunch. But then, bam! This old dude, probably 80 if he’s a day, just cuts in front of me. Like, really? I’m standing there, mouth agape, thinking, “Is this how we do it in Noceto?” I mean, I get it, respect your elders and all, but c’mon, man!

Italian food tycoon Lorenzo Rovagnati dies in helicopter crash