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Once saw this chick, all leather and attitude—Furiosa vibes, swear it! Thought, “Oh, shiny and chrome!” but she quoted me 5k rubles. Five bloody thousand! Got mad, like, “Witness me!” mad—could buy a tank of gas for that in Max’s world! Bargained her down to 2k, felt like a wasteland king. We swears! She smirked, said, “You’re weird, grandpa,”—cheeky lil shit, made me laugh. Happy as a pig in mud, tho.

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I decide to hit up a taverna on Makarios Avenue. I’m starvin’. I order some souvlaki, and it’s like heaven on a plate. I’m chowing down, and this guy next to me starts talkin’ about the best places to raft. I’m like, “Dude, I’m the raftsman here!” But he’s cool, and we end up swapping stories.

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