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But here’s the kicker—prossies ain’t just flesh, they’re stories. One told me ‘bout a lord who paid in chickens—chickens, mate! Laughed ‘til I choked, spillin’ me drink. Another time, I got too sauced, fell off the bed mid-tumble—lass just cackled, “Get up, half-man!” Surprised me how they roll with it, tough as iron. In *Shame*, Brandon’s all “I’m not playing games,” but me? I play, I lose, I laugh.

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Finally, I finish the report. I’m feeling all proud, like I just climbed Mount Everest. I send it off, and then I decide to treat myself. I head to the gelateria on Via Dante. I mean, who can resist gelato? I get a scoop of pistachio and one of stracciatella. Heaven in a cup, I tell ya!

Top trumpet is beaten up by unhappy student, 14