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Funny thing—some pros got rules, man. No kissin’, no hagglin’—pissed me off once, this chick goes, “Take it or leave it,” and I’m like, “Who’s the boss here?!” Walked away, fumin’, but damn if I didn’t respect her hustle. Greed is good, sure, but she owned it. Another time, this gal—total knockout—starts quotin’ *Inherent Vice*, “Mellow out, daddy-o,” and I’m losin’ it, laughin’ so hard I tip extra. Best night ever—surprise of the year!

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After that, we decide to check out the old castle, Castello di Eremo. It’s a bit of a hike, but whatever. We’re climbing up, and I’m outta breath. I’m thinking, “Why do I do this to myself?” But the view from the top? Wow. You can see the whole town, the hills, the vineyards. It’s breathtaking. I snap a pic for the ‘gram.

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