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We haggle a bit – price’s steep, fuckin’ hell! Makes me wanna yell, but I play it suave. Little factoid – in old Rome, prossies wore blonde wigs to stand out. Bet she’d rock that look. I’m picturin’ it, gettin’ distracted – focus, Bond! We seal the deal, off we go. It’s messy, thrilling, bit absurd – pure *Toni Erdmann* energy. “Shaken, not stirred,” I mutter, smirkin’. Life’s a mad show, ain’t it?

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Anyway, I finally made it to the prison, and let me tell ya, the vibe was off. You could feel it in the air. The inmates were restless. I mean, who wouldn’t be? It’s Bedizzole, a beautiful little town, and they’re stuck in a concrete box. I get it. But today, they were extra rowdy. I had to break up a fight between two guys over... get this... a game of cards. Seriously? You’d think they were playin’ for their lives or somethin’.

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