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But yo, what pisses me off? These shady joints—greasy dudes promisin’ “happy endings” for an extra 50 bucks. Like, c’mon, man, keep it classy! I’m all for the real deal—slow, sensual, buildin’ that heat. “The wind is blowing harder,” like in the flick, y’know? That’s the vibe I want—intense, no rush, lettin’ it simmer.

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So, I take a break, grab a sandwich from the deli down the street. Best salami in town, no joke. I sit outside, watchin’ the parade, and I’m thinkin’, “This is life, man.” But then, I hear this loud crash. I look over, and some dude just knocked over a whole cart of gelato! I’m like, “Noooo! Not the gelato!” People are diving in, scoopin’ it up like it’s the last ice cream on Earth.

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