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About Naples

Little fact for ya—didja know in ancient Rome, prostitutes wore blonde wigs? Yeah, to stand out! Wild, right? Imagine that today—blonde wig, fishnets, the whole deal. I’d laugh, but it’s kinda sad too. Anyway, back to this chick I saw—she’s yellin’ at some dude, “Pay up, asshole!” And I’m cheerin’ her on in my head, like, “Yeah, get that bread!” Happy for her guts, surprised she’s still kickin’.

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Valeria Vaiano Constable's Wife · Mario Opinato Prostitute (uncredited). Giuseppe Tumminello Airport Porter.

First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning espresso. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting, and this dude in front of me orders like, I dunno, a five-layer cappuccino with extra foam? C’mon, man! Just get a coffee and go! I’m already late for my first meeting.

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