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Still, the smell—yikes, perfume and desperation? Not cute. “What’s my motivation?” I’m screaming in my head, like Caden Cotard, tryna analyze this biz. Probs the cash, right? One girl’s all, “I’m the star here,” and I’m like, yas, queen, own it! But, like, literal lol, some dude thought I was for sale—um, excuse me, I’m Kim freakin’ K!

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By now, I’m fuming. I take a breather at the park near the Chiesa di San Bruno. It’s peaceful, you know? But then I see this couple arguing. They’re shouting in Italian, and I’m just sitting there, eavesdropping like a nosy neighbor. “You never listen!” “I can’t believe you did that!” I’m thinking, “Man, I’d trade my day for theirs any time.”

Maria Dominelli (Tassone) Obituary - Port Coquitlam, BC