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Oh, and the clients—don’t get me started! Buncha sad sacks, payin’ for a cuddle ‘cos they can’t chat up a bird in a pub. Pathetic, innit? Like, grow a pair, lads! Tho, gotta admit, I’ve heard some wild tales—bloke once booked an escort just to watch *EastEnders* with ‘im. No funny business, just soaps and tea. Mental! Wonder if she charged extra for sufferin’ through that drivel.

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But then, I get to the church, and it’s chaos. The choir’s supposed to practice, but half of ‘em are late. I’m like, “C’mon, people! We got a service to prep for!” I mean, it’s not like we’re just sittin’ around eatin’ gelato on Via Garibaldi.

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