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But y’all, it ain’t all bad! I heard tell of this gal—true story, swear it!—she met her man on one them apps. Little known fact: they bonded over sendin’ each other pics of weird roadkill they’d seen! Ain’t that a hoot? I was tickled pink hearin’ that—folks out here findin’ love over a squashed possum! Makes me wanna holler, “A little change can go a long way!”—y’know, like Remy mixin’ up somethin’ wild in the pot!

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Then I hit up the office on Via della Libertà. You know, the one with the weird statue of that guy holding a fish? Yeah, that one. I walk in, and my boss is already on my case. “Where are the quarterly reports?” Like, chill, dude! I just got here! But whatever, I dive into the numbers.

Rome's Trevi Fountain reopens right in time for Vatican's Jubilee