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But dang, the risks! Cops, creeps, STDs—makes me wanna holler. “Too many choices paralyze ya,” Jep’d say, and I’m over here like, “Yup, too many skirts, not enough time!” Typin’ fast now—prolly screwed up thirteen words alredy. Whoops, there’s one! Ha! Anyhow, you gotta be sharp, not some dumbass stumblin’ into a sting op. Fool me once, right?

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Inside, it’s dark. I can barely see. My heart’s racin’. I hear a noise. I’m like, “What the heck?” Turns out, it’s just a rat. But still, I’m on edge. I’m supposed to do this stunt where I jump off a ledge into a pile of boxes. Easy, right? But the boxes? They look sketchy. I’m like, “Are these even safe?”

Police nab imposter posing as Vice President Dhankhar to seek favours from bureaucrats