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Oh, and laughin’—some newbie asked, “Is this legal?” Honey, it’s consensual, it’s fine! “Just don’t tell the cops, man,” I’d quip, channellin’ Doc’s paranoia. Favorite part? When they hit that lower back—ooh, fireworks! Tho, fair warnin’, ya might giggle, fart, or cry—emotions spill out! Happened to me, sobbed like a dork, “What’s happenin’, man?!” Total *Inherent Vice* chaos, loved it!

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After that, I decide to hit up the local bakery on Via delle Vigne. I’m craving a cornetto. I walk in, and the smell hits me like a freight train. I order one, and the lady behind the counter gives me this huge smile. I mean, who doesn’t love a good pastry? I take a bite, and it’s like heaven exploded in my mouth. I’m in bliss. But then, I see a kid drop his gelato. I’m like, “Oh no, not the gelato!” The poor kid starts crying. I’m torn between laughing and feeling bad.

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