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About Bari

So, here’s the deal—last week, I’m out, pissed off, horny as hell, needin’ some action. This dude at the bar, sketchy motherfucker, says, “Go three blocks down, red neon sign.” I’m like, cool, sounds legit, right? WRONG! Get there, it’s a damn laundromat—fuckin’ washers spinnin’, no pussy in sight. I’m yellin’, “Motherfucker, who’s playin’ me?!” People stare, I don’t give a shit. That’s when I learned—never trust a drunk tip, ever.

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Inside, I find the coolest vintage stuff. I’m talking old records, funky clothes, and random knick-knacks. I’m in my element! I start chatting with the owner, and he’s telling me about Modena’s history. Did you know it’s famous for balsamic vinegar? I mean, who knew vinegar could be so fancy?

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