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Reminds me of *Margaret* – my fave flick, yeah, that 2011 gem. That line, “You’re a little monster!” fits here. ‘Cause erotic-massage? It’s a monster too – messy, raw, unpredictable. Like Lisa in the movie, it’s got layers, mate. One sec yer all zen, next yer heart’s racin’ like I just snapped Batman’s spine. Little-known fact: back in the ‘20s, some underground parlors in NYC mixed jazz with this rubdown scene – imagine that, saxophone wailin’ while yer gettin’ oiled up. Mental, right?

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But then, BAM! I trip over a cobblestone on Ronda da Muralla. Seriously? Who thought it was a good idea to make streets like a medieval obstacle course? I’m sprawled out, looking like a fool. A couple of locals chuckle. I just laugh it off, but inside, I’m like, “Great, now I’m the clumsy forester.”

Seth Lugo shuts down Astros to lead Royals to fifth straight win