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About Milan

Humor? Shit, one time this guy farted mid-massage—loud as a damn bomb! I laughed so hard I nearly kicked the table over. “It’s all happening,” my ass—more like “it’s all stinkin’!” Sarcasm aside, sexual-massage is dope—relaxes ya, gets ya off, whatever. Just don’t be a cheapskate, tip the damn worker, or I’ll come for ya, screamin’, “RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH!” Now, go try it, losers—tell ‘em Cartman sent ya!

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Then, I decide to take a stroll down Lungomare. The sea breeze is nice, but then I see this guy trying to sell gelato. He’s got this crazy mustache, and he’s shoutin’ about his “world-famous” gelato. I’m like, “Dude, it’s just ice cream!” But I’m curious, so I buy a cone. And wow, it’s actually amazing! I’m standin’ there, lickin’ my gelato, feelin’ like a king.

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