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About Rome

Oh, and the lies! Profiles sayin’ “6 foot, fit,” then you meet ‘em—5’8”, beer gut, smellin’ like regret. “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I’d say, if I could pick the liars out. Surprised me how bold they get—catfishin’ like it’s an Olympic sport. One time, this bloke sent me a dick pic, unasked! I’m like, “Mate, I didn’t order sausage!” Laughed my ass off, but also—eww, boundaries, ya pig!

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So, I keep walking, and I’m thinking, “Crotone, you beautiful mess.” I pass by the Castello di Carlo V, and it’s just as majestic as ever. I mean, who wouldn’t wanna live in a castle? But then I remember, I’d have to clean it. Nah, I’ll stick to my pigs.

Primavera: Palermo FC VS FC Crotone 5-2