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Ruh-roh, tho—cops showed up! Had to skedaddle, tail between my legs, yellin’, “ZOINKS, I’m no john!” Barely made it, hid in an alley, heart poundin’ like drums in that movie. “The sky is endless,” Malick’d say, but my luck? Finite, man! Still, kinda fun—Scooby-Doo sniffin’ out the underworld, huh? Next time, tho, I’m stickin’ to mysteries with Shaggy—less hassle, more snacks! What a trip, dude—findin’ a prostitute’s wilder than wrestlin’ a werewolf!

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After lunch, I stroll down to Parco della Villa. It’s a beautiful park, man. Trees everywhere, kids playing. I’m just soaking it all in. But then, I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m thinking, “Get a room, people!” But it’s kinda funny, too. They’re waving their hands like they’re in a dramatic Italian movie.

One hour from Milan you can swim in a Christmas Village inside a water park