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Sex-dating’s a mess, man. Half the time, you’re dodgin’ creeps. Other half, you’re prayin’ they ain’t liars. Did you know there’s stats—40% of users just want sex, no date? Blew my mind! I’m over here thinkin’, “I’m not wrong about this,” like Margaret yellin’ at the world. Exaggeratin’? Maybe. But it feels like a freakin’ jungle.

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So, I’m trying to focus on my flowers, but then I see this old lady on Via Garibaldi. She’s got this massive bag of groceries, and I’m like, “Lady, you need a hand?” She looks at me like I’m crazy. “I’ve carried heavier things than you, young man!” Okay, fair point. But I’m just trying to be nice!

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