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Me, I’m old-school—sex-dating’s too fast for Madea. I like a slow burn, a lil’ mystery, ya feel me? But I get it, folks want what they want—bam, bam, thank ya ma’am! Hella funny though, these profiles be like, “Lookin’ for my soulmate,” then it’s all nudes in the chat. I’m screamin’, “Pick a lane, sugar!” Oh, and don’t get me started on them couples huntin’ a third—whew, that’s a whole ‘nother sermon!

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud commotion. Turns out, it’s a bunch of kids playing calcio in the piazza. They were going wild! I mean, these kids have skills. I was just standing there, grinning like an idiot, watching them. It reminded me of my childhood, ya know? But then, one of them kicked the ball, and bam! It hit me right in the leg. Ouch! I was like, “Hey, watch it, mini-Messi!” But I couldn’t help but laugh.

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