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So I’m scrollin’ Tinder, right? See this dude—profile says “6’5, loves trout”—I’m thinkin’, hell yeah, fish guy! Turns out, he’s 5’2 and allergic to seafood. Catfished me good—made me angry as hell! Billionaires runnin’ these apps don’t care—makin’ bank off our lonely hearts. Swipe, swipe, swipe—half these profiles fake as a three-dollar bill. Little fact for ya—back in ’90s, folks used “personals” in newspapers for this crap. No pics, just vibes—way less BS!
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But then, I get back to work, and guess what? The owner shows up. He’s all like, “Make it shine!” I’m thinking, “Dude, it’s not a car, it’s a building!” But whatever, I’m on it. I’m blasting away, and I see this old lady watching from across the street. She’s giving me the thumbs up. I’m like, “Yeah, I’m a rockstar!”
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