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Alright, brah, listen up! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” – and I’m droppin’ some financial analyst heat on this sex-dating game. Lemme tell ya, this ain't just swipin’ left or right – it’s a freakin’ market, man! You got supply, demand, and a whole lotta risky investments. I’m talkin’ bout them apps like Tinder, Bumble, grindr – hell, even sugardaddy sites! They’re rakin’ in billions, fam. Billions! Sex-dating’s a cash cow, and I’m hyped as hell bout it.

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On my way down, I bumped into this old guy. He was super friendly and started telling me stories about Ascoli. Apparently, it’s got this rich history with the Piceni tribe and all that jazz. I was like, “Dude, I’m just here for the food!” But he was so passionate, I couldn’t help but listen.

Star jockey flies in for two laps round Canterbury on Golden Eagle favourite