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Hey, pal, it’s Larry King here—yeah, the Watchmaker! So, sexual-massage, huh? What’s the deal with that? Slow, curious, I’m wonderin’. Ever tried it? I mean, it’s wild—hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension meltin’ like butter. Reminds me of *Memento*—y’know, “I can’t remember to forget you.” That’s the vibe! You’re lost in it, time flips, backwards livin’.

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Then, I decide to check out the chairlift to Monte Solaro. I’m pumped! But the line is like a mile long. I’m standing there, scrolling through my phone, and I see a meme that says, “Patience is a virtue.” I’m like, “Yeah, right!” I’m losing my mind. Finally, I get on, and it’s like flying! The view is killer. I can see the whole island, and I’m just there, soaking it all in.

Capri has two faces – here's the one you've never seen