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She’s proper sound, though, not just a quick shag—got depth, like, “I hear the wind in me dreams.” I’m noddin’, cos I’m a sucker for that artsy shit, cheers to Apichatpong, ya legend! Made me laugh, too, cos she’s like, “Some blokes think I’m a monkey spirit!” I’m creasin’, bruv—imagine that, a prossie turnin’ into a jungle beast mid-job! “That’s peak,” I say, and she’s cacklin’ with me.

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Also, I gotta mention my fave thing: the quirky little bridge on Drinan Creek – it's all rickety like an old joke and makes funny creaky sounds as I skip near it sometimes. I remember my buddy asking, "Hey, is mayonnaise an instrument?" right as I stepped off the bridge, lol! That day, I felt, like, super happy and sorta surprised by my own silliness.

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