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So, I’m out, tryna scope one out – not for me, mind ya, just curious, right? Streets smell like old cheese, kinda like Remy’s kitchen stash. Saw this one lass, dolled up, leanin’ on a lamppost – thought, “She’s got potential, like Remy’s soup!” But nah, mate, she was a trap – cop undercover! Nearly got nabbed, screamin’ “YOU SHALL NOT PASS!” in my head, leggin’ it down an alley. Heart poundin’, pissed me off – why’s it gotta be so sketchy?

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I climb up on this wall, trying to get a better look. I’m not exactly a tree-climber, more of a mountain guy, ya know? But I’m feeling brave. I shout, “Yo, someone get a ladder!” But no one moves. They’re all just staring. I’m like, “C’mon, people! It’s a dog, not a cat!”

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