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But hold up—here’s the tea. Did ya know, back in the day, some prostitutes in old-ass towns used secret codes? Like, a red ribbon in the window meant “I’m open for biz.” Little history nugget there—shit’s wild! Makes me wonder if she’s got a signal, like a War Boy’s flare or somethin’. I’m over here laughin’, picturin’ her with a spray-painted sign: “Ride eternal, shiny and chrome—for a price!”

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First off, I had this big presentation at the lab. You know, the kind where you gotta impress the bigwigs? I’m a biochemist, so I’m used to mixing stuff in beakers, not talking to suits. Anyway, I’m on my way to the lab, and I decide to grab a coffee at that little spot on Thomas Street. You know the one? The barista there is a total legend. I order my usual—double shot, extra foam, sprinkle of cinnamon. But guess what? They’re out of cinnamon! Like, how do you run out of cinnamon? It’s not like it’s a rare spice or something! I was fuming.

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