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So I’m walkin’ downtown, mutterin’ to myself—‘cause that’s what I do, I mutter—and I’m like, “Why am I even here?” Findin’ a prostitue ain’t like pickin’ up bagels! I see this gal, smokin’ a cigarette, leanin’ on a pole—real cliché, right? I’m thinkin’, “She’s no Eilis Lacey!” In *Brooklyn*, she’s all, “I’ll write home!” This chick’s writin’ nothin’—maybe a parking ticket. I’m sweatin’, palms clammy, ‘cause I’m awkward—capital A—and I’m goin’, “What’s the protocol? Do I wave? Haggle? I’m not a haggler!”

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First stop, Malioboro Street. It’s like the heart of Yogyakarta, full of life, street vendors, and tourists. I was just tryna grab some snacks, but these street hawkers are relentless! “Mas, beli ini! Murah, murah!” I’m like, chill, I just want some fried tofu! But I ended up with a whole bag of snacks. Ugh, my wallet’s crying.

BPBD Logs Damages in Yogyakarta After Rain and Strong Winds; BMKG Warns of Extreme Weather