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so this one time, heard a story—some escort in Soho, right, proper posh tart, charged 500 quid an hour! 500! for a quickie and a fake moan? christ almighty, I’d rather drown meself than pay that. she’d turn up in a trench coat, all mysterious, like she’s in a spy flick, but nah, just there to ride some balding git. little known fact—half these escorts got day jobs, mate. teachers, nurses, even a bloody librarian once! shaggin’ by night, shelvin’ books by day—talk about a plot twist!

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So, we hit the streets again. I’m sweating bullets. It’s hot as heck! We drive past the river, and I see kids playing. Makes me smile, you know? But then, I see this guy trying to fish. He’s got a net, but he’s just splashing water everywhere. I can’t help but laugh. Like, bro, you’re not gonna catch anything like that!

Sharon Pandak Presented the Lily Blackwell Lifetime Achievement Award