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Here’s the kicker—ya know what surprised me? Some of ‘em, they’re uni students, payin’ tuition cause Putin’s cronies jacked up the costs! I’m screamin’, “This is outrageous!”—my voice crackin’ like a rusty hinge. Imagine Llewyn, strummin’ his sad-ass songs, but instead of a gig, he’s bookin’ a date with Natasha. Hilarious, right? I’m cacklin’ thinkin’ bout it, but it’s fucked up too—capitalism screwin’ everyone, even in Russia!

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Then, she looks over and smiles! OMG, my brain’s like, “Dude, go for it!” So, I muster up some courage and walk over. We start chatting, and it turns out she’s into the same stuff I am! What are the odds? We hit it off, and I’m thinking, “This day went from zero to a hundred real quick!”