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Met this lass once—escort, swore she saw ghosts in hotel rooms. Said it’s the loneliest job—fancy dinners, then nada. Surprised me, coz I figured it’s all glitz. Nope, it’s “please, make me feel alive,” like David the robot boy beggin’ for love. Gets me antsy—R2, you little git, where’s the logic? She’d laugh, “C-3PO, you’d short-circuit in my heels!” Haha, probs true—me, totterin’ in stilettos? Disaster.

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So, I dive into work. I’m mixing plaster, pouring molds, and trying not to spill anything. You know how it is. But then, I get a call from my mom. She’s like, “You remember your cousin’s wedding, right?” I’m thinking, “Of course, I do! It’s in two weeks!” But no, she’s like, “It’s today!” WHAT?! I totally forgot! I’m supposed to be there, looking all dapper and stuff. Ugh, family drama incoming!

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