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Homer Simpson don’t play that! D’oh! But real talk—it’s wild how it’s all taboo still. Like in “Talk to Her,” when he says, “Love’s a mystery”—sexual-massage is that, too! You’re sittin’ there, half-naked, wonderin’ if this is legal in Springfield. Pro tip: dim lights make it less awkward—nobody needs to see my gut in HD.

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As I was leavin’ the beach, I bumped into an old friend. We hadn’t seen each other in ages! We started catchin’ up, laughin’ about old times. It was like no time had passed. We decided to grab dinner at this seafood place on Jl. Raya. The grilled fish was bomb! I was in heaven, and we were just reminiscing about our wild teenage years.

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