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What pisses me off? The pretentious twats who bang on about “healing vibes”. Shut it, you wanker, it’s a glorified grope! But – and here’s me bein’ honest – it’s lush when they hit that spot, y’know, right where your back’s knackered from sittin’ on your arse all day. Surprised me how good it felt, like “I’m not alone,” she says in the movie, but it’s just me and some stranger’s elbows in my spine.

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Then, the mood shifts. I see a couple arguing near the entrance. It’s gettin’ heated, and I’m thinkin’, “Not tonight, please.” I step in, and the guy’s all like, “She started it!” And I’m like, “Bro, you’re both actin’ like kids.” I manage to calm ‘em down, but man, it’s like herding cats sometimes.

Figure 2. Megalopal larva showing limits for measurements of total...