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Then there’s the funny side—escort ads online, man. “Discrete, classy escort”—yeah, right! Prolly some dude named Gary in a tracksuit. Cracked me up, thinkin bout Oscar playin all them roles—escort’s a damn performance! You pay, they act, motherfucker—simple as that.
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So, I finally get my tomatoes and head back to the park. I’m ready to plant these bad boys. But guess what? The ducks are back! They’re like, “Oh, look, it’s the gardener! Let’s mess with him!” They start waddling over, and I’m like, “Not today, quackers!” I shoo them away, but they just look at me like I’m the crazy one.
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