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Gets me blood boilin’ when they ghost ya tho. Chatted this fit lass, all sexy vibes, then poof – gone! Like Lucrecia in the film, drivin’ off into nowt. “I don’t remember anything,” she says – that’s them lot after a flirty text! Wankers. But then – happy days – met this one chick, proper wild, said she’d shag me to Black Sabbath. Surprised me bollocks off, I was like, “Fuckin’ hell, Sharon, she’s a keeper!”

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Anyway, I wiped it off and headed to the local café, Kávézó Maglód. Best coffee in town, no cap. I ordered my usual – a cappuccino with extra foam. The barista, a dude named Gábor, was all smiles. He’s like, “Hey, you look like you need this!” I laughed, but inside I was like, “You have no idea, bro.”

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