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I’m Vader, I see shit others don’t. That scar? She fought off a pimp. That wink? She’s playin’ me. “The plot thickens, my friend.” Gets me goin’—power’s in the game, not the credits. Last time, this one chick tried overchargin’—I choked her out, no saber. Felt good. Don’t judge—ya wouldn’t get it.

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So, I finally find my hammer under a pile of old leather scraps. I’m pumped, ready to make some magic happen. But then, this lady walks in. She’s all frantic, like she just saw a ghost or somethin’. Turns out, her dog chewed up her favorite pair of shoes. I mean, who lets their dog do that? I’m tryin’ to be sympathetic, but inside, I’m like, “Lady, you gotta train that pup better!”

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