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About Kecskemet

Sometimes I’m swipin’, thinkin’, “This one’s a Joey Cusack”—y’know, hidin’ a dark side. Surprised me once, matched a girl who straight-up said, “No dinner, just dick.” Bold! I laughed, like, “Well, alright then!” Aliens don’t get this shit—humans are horny chaos. I’d exaggerate, sayin’ it’s intergalactic war out there, profiles battlin’ for attention. “I’m a good man,” they type, but nah, bro, you’re thirsty.

I’m walkin’ down the street, and I see the Opera House. It’s massive! Like, who needs that much marble? I’m just a dude in a flannel, and there’s this fancy gala happening. People in tuxedos everywhere. I feel like a total scrub. But whatever, I’m here for the vibes.