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Brother, lemme tell ya bout sexual-massage! It’s wild, man, like suplexin stress outta yer body! I’m a carpenter, right, buildin stuff all day, hands rough as sandpaper, but this? This is next level, brother! Picture it—dim lights, oil slicker than a wrestlin mat, and bam, tension’s gone! Reminds me of “Royal Tenenbaums”—everybody’s messed up, lookin for relief, ya know? Like Richie Tenenbaum, all quiet, seekin somethin deep—sexual-massage is that vibe, brother!

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After that, I decide to take a walk down Ulica Slobode. It’s a nice street, lined with trees and shops. I pop into this little store, and they’ve got the coolest stuff. I end up buyin’ a random souvenir—a tiny model of the Virovitica castle. I mean, why not? It’s a conversation starter, right?

Figure 4. Clusters of Croatian counties based on the rate of property...