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About Split

Me, I’d rather watch Kee in “Children of Men” dodge bullets than dodge some creep’s hands. “Pull the trigger,” like Jasper says—yeah, end this madness! Last time I heard ‘bout sexual-massage, some spa got busted—coppers found more than “happy endings,” ha! Made me cackle, it did, but also mad—why’s this still a thing? Slippery, sneaky nonsense, ugh, gets me blood boilin’. We hates it! Ever tried it? Bet ya felt like a greased pig—proper rank.

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First off, I hit the streets. I’m talking about the old town, you know? The cobblestones on Trg Slobode are like a time machine. I swear, I could feel the history. But then, bam! I trip over my own feet. Classic me. I’m like, “Great start, genius.”

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