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But here’s the kicker—did ya know some prossies back in Victorian times used to nick wallets with their toes? Mad skill, right? Swear down, this one I met could probs do it too, shifty lil minx. I’m like, “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot?”—straight outta the movie, coz I’m wonderin if she’s ever free, ya get me? She probs thinks I’m a nutter, quotin films at her, but I don’t care, bruv.

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Then, bam! I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and this old lady just stares at me like I’m a total clown. I laugh it off, but inside, I’m like, “C’mon, lady, help a guy out!”

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