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About Lille

Thing is, it’s messy, man. Ya think it’s all sexy and fun, but nah – it’s sad, too. Got me feelin’ weird, like when Winfried sings that whacky song and ya don’t know whether to laugh or cry. I’d tell ya, buddy, if yer lookin’ to “find a prostitute,” maybe chill. Ain’t worth the hassle. Go watch “Toni Erdmann” instead – way more bang for yer buck, no shady vibes. “Mmm… donuts,” that’s my therapy right there!

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Man, the local Park des Rêves – yeah, dreams even in French – is like my personal Zen den. You got these shitty benches I sometimes sit on (lol, the benches are beat-up but hey, it's character!), and that park is alive with nature and the hum of everyday life. Technically speaking, the park's geolocated exactly at 49.454? some hunch of coordinates – so precise, right? Almost as if Elon Musk coded its layout.

Trial involving former French mayor exposes drug dealers' hold on small towns