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Here’s a kicker – true story. Ancient Rome – they had this. Massage with a TWIST. Called it “frictio” – yeah. Rich dudes – gettin’ oiled up. By slaves – no shame. Blows my MIND. How’d they not – just LAUGH? I’d be crackin’ up – mid-rub. “Hey – Senator! Your ass – SHINY!” Hah!

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Finally, I get my coffee, and it’s bomb! I take a sip, and it’s like a hug in a cup. But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. “We got a situation at the park.” Great. Just what I wanted.

Seine River bursts its banks in Paris after days of non-stop rain